suatu outing itu.

salam.

mula2 takde la plan betul2 nak gather ke ape, just cakap2 dgn afiq aka apek yang i rindu dgn kawan2 rka dulu. then afiq kate, kalo nak gather, roger jek, die bleh tolong rogerkan kawan2 lain. than on friday, hari raya haji tu i pg rumah nana, die bertunang (congratulations dear~). mula2 tatau pon nana tunang, tp amal roger kata soh pg, so i pon siap n pg. so bila dah jumpa amal, i pon kata mesti best kalo bleh gather ramai2, afiq kata kalo nak gather roger je die. so amal ngn nana pon kate set. maka i pon telah meroger afiq untuk mengajak gather. maka semalam, bergather la kami. mula2 lepak dekat alif, restoran mamak kat tambak, pastu ramai2 pg tg piai. pastu solat dekat masjid serkat, n pg dinner sama2 kat permas. sangat havoc dn sgt rock la budak2 ni skrg, maybe sbb semua dah besar, tp still suka menyakat n loyar buruk sama je cam dulu. i memang tak pernah gather dgn this crowd of guys. selalu hang dgn budak2 baik mcm adzizie, ali, hadi, n all, tp kali ni, lepak dgn the darker side (ahahahaha) masa kat skolah dulu. so mereka2 yang datang:

girls. kami kaum perempuan memang tak ramai dlm kelas dulu. 2 kelas rka dan cuma ada 13 orang perempuan out of 60. yang lain sume lelaki.

1. amal: my very best friend. kawan gosip sehidup semati.
2. ummu: skrg dh jadi lecturer kat utm. baru lepas interview nak pg oversea untuk further her phd.
3. bedah: baru balik dpd kenduri kawen, terus pg mamak. sgt kecoh sama je mcm dulu. sumber gosip utama (sebab die yang paling ramai contact kat kawasan kukup sana).
4. nana: join cuma mase dinner, sbb kitorg lmbt bgtau die, die dah janji dulu dgn tunang die nak kuar cari brg hantaran.
5. noor: jumpe kat tg piai. sbb die keje sane skrg. sbb die la kami dpt separuh harga untuk entrance fee. haha. dan die jugak la yang bertanggungjawab membelanja semua orang punye dinner.

guys. ade la dlm 4 ke 5 kereta kot mase gi tg piai tu.
1. afiq @ apek: dulu kat skola i jarang gile cakap dgn die ni. tp skrg die la yg selalu contact dkt ym n facebook. bertanggungjawab mengumpulkan segerombolan budak2 lelaki yg join gathering ni.
2. harif: rasenye la spell name die mcm tu kalo i tak silap. haha. kenal muka die. tp nama tak ingat. same je mcm dulu. diam jek.
3. ayul: anak cikgu safiah. paling kecoh n paling byk tanya.
4. arif @ tonjang: die ni muka paling tak berubah. masih tinggi. masih sama rupa. cara cakap pon masih sama.
5. shahir.
6. hazeli.
7. anuar @ jueh.
8. azahari @ zack.
9. najib.
10. malan.
11. shahizwan @ sabun.
12. khaizum. die ni bukan clasmet. tp kawan kepada clasmet. ntah sape yg bwk die. tp he's a great sport la, tak kesah pon.
13. napi: he's also my boyfren's fren. agak rapat jugak kot. jadi asyik la bertanya mane la en boyfren. ish.
14. a-rey.

sungguh2 sgt best. dn malan ajak pg umah die 13 disember nt, wedding abang die. maybe bleh jadi next gathering?

looking forward to our next gath!

ps: gmbr takde. my camera rosak. i rase handicap gile bile takde kamera ni. ayo.

pps: puas hati?

sudahlah.

sekarang semua orang dah tahu. tahu cuma cerita versi kau. dan the so-called kawan2 tu pun tak pernah bother untuk dengar cerita versi aku. tak bagi peluang langsung untuk aku defend diri sendiri. memanglah kau merana. aku tahu kau merana. tapi sebab kita ade crowd kawan2 yang sama. mereka nampak kau yang baik. kau lah mangsa kezaliman aku. aku lah yang paling jahat. aku lah yang hancurkan hati kau. tapi hati aku yang hancur mereka tak nampak. perasaan aku mereka tak tahu. kenapa? sbb aku tak pernah beritahu. masalah aku adalah masalah aku. aku tak pernah malukan kau depan kawan2 aku atau kawan2 kau. aku tak pernah cerita apa2 pun pada siapa2. semua rahsia kau, siapa kau sebenar, aku simpan kuat2 dalam hati aku. aku tak tahu sama ada kau atau siapa pun yang sebarkan cerita, tapi kawan2 aku dah bukan lagi kawan2 aku. okay. mungkin bukan semua. mungkin hanya yang rapat dengan kau. yang jadi saksi penderitaan kau. tapi aku dah hilang sebahagian daripada kawan2 aku. kawan2 yang pernah bertukar cerita, berkongsi meja dengan aku satu masa dulu. aku ralat. sebab mereka tak pernah tahu apa yang sebenarnya terjadi. mungkin kalau mereka tahu apa yang terjadi, mereka tak akan benci aku. mungkin kalau mereka tahu cerita dari pihak aku, mereka tak akan buang aku. atau tidak. mungkin mereka masih benci dan buang aku walaupun mereka tahu cerita versi aku. tapi tak apa. sekurang-kurangnya mereka tahu kisah sebenar. sekurang-kurangnya mereka tahu cerita dari dua belah pihak. sekurang-kurangnya mereka menghukum aku kerana memang salah aku. ya. aku mengaku. aku memang bersalah. semuanya bukan salah kau sepenuhnya. mungkin jika aku lebih berterus terang tentang apa yang aku rasa, perkara tak akan jadi seteruk ini. mungkin jika aku lebih lantang bersuara, mereka akan mendengar. tapi aku bukan orang yang berterus terang dengan apa yang aku rasa. aku bukan orang yang lantang bersuara. dan kau tahu. kau tahu semuanya. kau tahu aku tidak akan bersuara walaupun hati aku sakit. sebab kau adalah antara manusia yang mengenali siapa aku sebenarnya. kau adalah antara manusia yang tahu cara aku berfikir dan bertindak. kau adalah antara manusia yang tahu aku sanggup korbankan segalanya termasuk perasaan aku sendiri demi orang2 penting dalam hidup aku. kau tahu. jadi mungkin kawan2 aku tak akan tahu perkara sebenar. jadi mungkin kawan2 aku tak akan tahu cerita versi aku. sebab aku tak pernah berniat nak bercerita kepada mereka. kepada sesiapa. jadi mungkin mereka akan terus hukum aku. dan aku akan terus menjadi villain dalam cerita ini. tapi aku rasa aku lebih sanggup terus jadi villain daripada memalukan sesiapa. dan cerita2 yang terlepas? dan kawan2 yang bukan lagi kawan2? memang aku kesal. tapi tak ada apa yang boleh aku buat lagi untuk selamatkan keadaan. even kau minta maaf seribu tahun sekali pun, even aku dah maafkan kau hingga ke dosa terakhir kau dengan aku, aku tetap hilang kawan2. aku tetap jadi penghancur hati di mata kawan2 aku. aku tetap dihina. aku tetap manusia yang buat kau merana. sebab tak ada apa yang kau boleh buat untuk mengubah pandangan mereka terhadap aku. sebab apa yang terjadi dah pun terjadi. maka aku redha walaupun aku sedih. aku redha aku hilang kawan2. aku redha aku jadi penjahat. aku redha mereka pandang aku hina.

sebab aku tak akan sekali2 menceritakan keburukan sesiapa kepada sesiapa pun, walaupun akibatnya keburukan itu jadi milik aku.

----

salam.

first skali nak btau, remember the dinner yg i mentioned kat previous entry yg khairul said it'll be special bla bla bla? well, the dinner sucks. ok not because one of us spoilt the evening, bukan2. bukan salah kami. salah makanan. the food tak sedap. ok bukan la sampai tahap tak boleh makan, sbb i memg lapar so i telan je, tp i pernah jumpe menu yg sama yg jauh lebih sedap dpd those food. n i malas la nak complain byk2 kan, sbb khairul mmg merungut je spnjg time makan tu. die memg sgt la particular tentang ape yg masuk dlm mulut die. so bile die dh asyik merungut, tak kan la i pon nak merungut jugak kan. so i dengar kan je dn telan je la makanan yg dh terhidang tu. oh and the price is damn expensive too. kitorg pernah mkn menu yg lebih kurg same dgn harga less than rm70. n guess how much this dinner cost us? rm95.70. haih. dah la tak sedap. memg la takkan dtg lagi kat situ.

so i dh smpi kajang on friday sebenarnya. pastu tido kajang satu mlm. pastu mlm ni (sebenarnya dh pagi pon) tido la umah terchenta ni. ntah la memg i ni ade trouble sleeping ke ape kan, tp kalo smpi kat serdang ni, mesti susah nk tido. kalo kat umah kajang ke umah pontian ke, even mase lepak bilik ain kat utm pon, pkul 1 tu dh tak bleh bukak mate dh. tp kalo kat serdang ni, pkul 3 pon masih fresh lagi la mate ni tak mau tutup. ok die boleh je nak tutup sbnrnye tp u got the idea la kan. aiyoo.

next week kami the rockin housemates ade plan besar yg menyusahkan diri sendiri dan mengoyakkan poket yg tak berape berisi ni. kami nak tour pg pantai timur. sbb hari first raya haji tu my ex rumet -ana- yg jugak ex rumet neya nak kawen. sebenrnye die dah nikah pon tp baru nak sanding ni kan. dn hari raya kedua tu senior kitorg nak kawen. pastu ade la nk pg melawat anak zihan punye cukur jambul ke ape ntah. pastu nk melawat trex. bukan trex dinosor. trex yg name btol die atirah. haha. dn sebenarnye kitorg love any excuse to berjalan2. maka raya haji tahun ni jauh la dpd umah. huhu. sedih jugak sbnrnye, sbb mase raya haji ni la mak nak masak bende sedap2. tp ingatkan nak balik umah pas tour tu so harap mak dpt masakkan lagi la. hahaha.

nak kena lelapkan mata. walaupun esok ahad dn i boleh tido smpi tgh hari. tp kene tido jugak skrg. mari tutup mata dn berangan kawen dgn prince charming.

quick update.

salam.

hola. skrg tgh packing sbb esok nak balik johor. haha. sbb nt raya haji tak balik sbb insya Allah nk pg wedding ana dgn kak bazzy. so kene balik la kalo tak nt kene isytihar anak derhaka karang tak masuk syurga pulak. maka update sbb nak bgtau this geeky nerdy girl just bought 2 new novels!


and finished reading them too!

ok so far out of this too, rasenye where rainbows end lagi best kot, sbb cara writer die tulis kinda unique. cerita die basically simple je, two bestfriends yang dh kawan baik since 5 didnt even realize they love each other, or they actually did but neither one of them wanted to admit their feeling. so they've ended up marrying other person and getting children and all. smpi la one time ni the guy finally admit yg die in love dgn the girl, which actually not really a girl anymore, since mase the guy confess tu, they were 50 years old! cliche enough. yg best n unik nye, cerita ni bukan mcm cerita biasa. this novel consists of lots and lotsa emails, letters, short messages, n stuff. memg takde langsung perenggan2 ke ape, kecuali die punye epilogue. so best la.

remember me pulak pasal satu girl ni yg accident pastu woke up dgn memories of three years back. she kinda lost a huge chunk of her memories, bcz in these three years, she actually married a mr. perfect, hac a perfect job, perfect look n stuff la. best jugak.

so im going to finish my packing (omg there are still sooo many things to pack!!) and if there is still time i want to watch a korean drama, cruel love (hero die lelaki yang berlakon stairway to heaven tu). cite sedih, first episod je dh byk nangis2. tp happy ending kot. tatau. tak abes tgk lagi. baru episod 4. n ive bought this dvd like half a year ago. hahahaha.

tomorrow got meeting with dr fauzi my ever beloved supervisor n after lunch, i'll be off to johor. and i'll have my dinner with khairul somewhere, i dunno, he said it'll be special just for two of us, n i just cant wait!

till then, tata~

sorries.

Dear brain,
sorry for overloading you with thoughts of him.

Dear tummy,
sorry for all the butterflies.

Dear pillow,
sorry for all the tears.

Dear heart,
sorry for all the damages.

Dear me,
sorry for being head-over-heels in love with him.

allergy.

salam.

hari ni i nak cerita pasal allergic. allergy. bukan elegi sepi macam yang azharina nyanyi tu. bukan2. tp allergy yang allergy la. tp my operational definition (cehceh mcm tgh tulis chapter 1 thesis pulak nak operational definition kan) kat sini is restriction to eat anything or to have physical contact with anything that will do damaged to ur body. any kind of damage. gatal2 ke. muntah2 ke. ape2 la.

kenape tibe2 rase mcm nak ckp pasal allergy? sbb td, hujan lebat sgt. kat my place ni, kalo hujan yg lebat sgt, air akan bertakung kat parking kereta tu. bertakung mcm banjir. bukan mcm kat kelantan tu. bukan2. bertakung yang cukup untuk tenggelamkan my whole feet kalo i pakai selipar buruk kaler pink yg beli kat giant mines tu. and to make it worse, my place ni anjing byk jalan-jalan, orang buang sampah sepah2, so i think u got the idea how euwwy air yang bertakung is.

dan tadi la jugak fakulti call kate my check dah siap. check yg claim untuk elaun demonstrator lab phy2001. mestila i nak ambik kan, mane bleh tunggu esok. lagi pun i nak anta tudung putih kat my sister yg kat mersing tu. pos laju. so i kene kuar la jugak kan by hook or by crook. hujan lebat atau panas terik.

ingat eh. hujan lebat. air bertakung kat parking lot. sampah byk sepah2. ok.

ok then pkul 2.30 i pon roger la aifaa soh turun. aifaa tunggu kat lift tingkat 9. so trun la same2. God its raining heavily sampai nampak everything mcm kaler grey jek. pastu i parking kat sebelah lift. usually i tak parking kat situ tp the night before i balik malam sbb beli beras kat giant mines dgn housemates n that was the only parking lot yg ade.

n there u go. dah la hujan lebat. tempat i parking tu pulak la tempat yg paling dalam air bertakung. i dgn aifaa dah gelak2 dah, sambil fikir mcm mane la nak pg kat kereta ni. last2 kene la redah jugak. rendam la kaki dlm air yg ade God knows what. masuk kereta je terus bukak selipar. kaki memg dah basah habis la kan. sangat geli tp nak buat mcm mane.

belum pon separuh jalan, kaki dah gatal2. mesti allergic dgn air. i memg la kalah dgn air yg tak berape bersih ni. worst case scenario, kalo air tu sgt lah kotor tak bleh tolerate, my whole body akan naik rashes yg gatal smpi tak bleh nk tido mlm sbb asyik nak menggaru jek. so tatau la sbb psikologi i yg kate air kat tempat parking yg dh merendam kaki i dan kaki2 God knows how many people sgt kotor smpi kaki i gatal2, atau memg air tu kotor menyebabkan kaki i gatal2. tp memg gatal la. so abes je sume station yg kene singgah -jbtn fizik, pejabat bendahari fakulti, cimb, post office, mcdonalds-, terus balik rumah n basuh kaki dgn sabun dettol. sabun dettol ye kawan2. dan jeans yang i pakai td - jeans baru kuar dpd drawer ye, baru basuh, baru first time pakai- dah masuk dlm bakul laundry.

n yet sampai sekarang kaki i masih gatal2 lagi. sampai i terpaksa letak minyak angin nak elak garu2.

dan some of bende2 lain yg i rase (rase ye haha) i allergy:

1. seafood. rasenye ni allergy yang paling common kot. dan i cuma tak bleh makan udang jek. bcz if i did, nt jari2 i yang tak berapa nak runcing dan halus ni akan naik bintat-bintat merah yang berair tu menyebabkan ia kelihatan lebih tidak runcing dan lebih tidak halus. i sebenarnye tak pernah ade allergy dgn seafood sampai la mase i second year, i selalu kene bisul kat mate. ade satu doktor kat PK ni kate i allergic dgn seafood padahal i tak pon, so die bg i ubat ape ntah yang lepas i makan jek, badan i terus naik gatal2 n jadi lagi teruk bile i makan udang. sungguh cis la doktor ni. bagi ubat makin buat allergy ke ape. dapat medical degree kat mexico ke. so since then memg la i tak bleh makan udang. tp i buat2 boleh je. telan je sume udang yang ade. boils or no boils, sanggup ku redahi demi kelazatan seekor udang. hahahaha.

2. oily food. by oily, i mean too oily yang smpi u boleh nmpk minyak2 die. ni selalunye ade kat ayam goreng yg dah kene goreng for God knows how many times. nasi minyak, nasi beriani, nasi tomato, nasi2 yang berlaukkan lauk yang lebih kurang mcm tu pon. nt i sakit kepala. sakit kepala sampai rase mcm nak muntah. haha. yang ni i memg pantang la. tak larat weh sakit kepala. ape keje pon tak jalan. n since skrg ni my hempedu ade problem, memg la lagi tak bleh makan lemak2. tapi badan makin lame makin berlemak. dgn lemak badan sendiri tak de nak allergic pulak. haha.

3. shampoo rejoice. i figure out yg i tak bleh pakai shampoo rejoice ni mase kat samura. one day tu my shampoo abes n i mintak la shampoo one of my dormmates dn i end up sakit kepala wengweng sampai kene dok sickbay satu hari. mule2 tu tatau la yg buat sakit kepala tu shampoo, ingat bende salah makan ke panas sangat ke ape ntah. pastu pakai lagi sekali, pon masuk sickbay lagi. sah la. yang ni pon i tak ignore. i memg avoid shampoo rejoice.

4. body odour. atau pon bau2 yang tidak menyenangkan. i memg sgt sensitif, my nose memg sgt peka terhadap bau yg pelik2 especially bau badan. dn i akan suffer lagi teruk than others la kalo terbau bau pelik2 ni. sampai satu tahap boleh termuntah. huhu. no offense la people with body odour, deodoran melambak-lambak jual kat supermarket. bukan mahal pon. takkan la diri sendiri pon tak bau.

5. bende masam. yang ni i bukan allergic. i tak suke. taksuketaksuketaksuke. tak boleh terime. intolerable.

dan byk lagi la since i ni memg demand orangnye. haha.

so sebenarnye allergy ni byk main dgn kite nye psikologi (oh adakah ini bermaksud i seorang psiko???). mind over matter. tp bagi kes2 yg teruk sampai masuk hospital n everything tu, tu memg kene elak la kan. tapi untuk orang yang banyak sangat songeh (haha) mcm i ni, kene la ubati perasaan tu sendiri. bukan selamanya kita hidup senang kan. bukan setiap masa pun kite bleh dpt ape yang kite nak. huhu.

ok skrg kene tido esok pagi kene present storyboard kat dr fauzi. walaupun blom siap lagi. haha. tido itu lebih penting.

nite-nite.

mom...

I'm five years old, it's getting cold, I've got my big coat on
I hear your laugh and look up smiling at you, I run and run
Past the pumpkin patch and the tractor rides, look now, the sky is gold
I hug your legs and fall asleep on the way home

I don't know why all the trees change in the fall
But I know you're not scared of anything at all
Don't know if Snow White's house is near or far away
But I know I had the best day with you today

I'm thirteen now and don't know how my friends could be so mean
I come home crying and you hold me tight and grab the keys
And we drive and drive until we found a town far enough away
And we talk and window shop 'til I've forgotten all their names

I don't know who I'm gonna talk to now at school
But I know I'm laughing on the car ride home with you
Don't know how long it's gonna take to feel okay
But I know I had the best day with you today

I have an excellent father, his strength is making me stronger
God smiles on my little brother, inside and out, he's better than I am
I grew up in a pretty house and I had space to run
And I had the best days with you

There is a video I found from back when I was three
You set up a paint set in the kitchen and you're talking to me
It's the age of princesses and pirate ships and the seven dwarfs
And Daddy's smart and you're the prettiest lady in the whole wide world

And now I know why the all the trees change in the fall
I know you were on my side even when I was wrong
And I love you for giving me your eyes
For staying back and watching me shine
And I didn't know if you knew, so I'm takin' this chance to say
That I had the best day with you today

Taylor Swift - The Best Day

dedicated to the best mom God ever created. i love u mom. really really love u.

meronda bersama housemates.

salam.

lebih kurang hari isnin hari tu kot, tgh2 kitorg bertiga tgk tv, tibe2 neya kate, ' gi jalan2 jom?'. so i pun suggest melaka, n along suggest bukit tinggi. mule2 mcm tak yakin je nak pg ke tak kan, plus skrg ni musim hujan, so what's the point of going there kalo hujan kan. tp pagi sabtu tu sume org siap n menaiki mr bird, kitorg pon gerak ke bukit tinggi dgn harapan tak hujan la hari tu.

berhenti breakfast kat RnR genting sempah. oh god, every where ade org kelantan yg sgt2 berbaju merah putih. ade lebih dpd 4 buah bas kot yg ade bendera kelantan since mlm tu ade match yang kelantan lawan negeri sembilan yang negeri sembilan menang pastu org kelantan bakar seat kat stadium. well, we know kelantanese are kinda weird that way, they love their state so much that sometimes they do across the line but im not talking about mereka.

pastu kitorg pon teruskan perjalanan, smpi ke rabbit park, after that colmar tropicale, dan baru japanese village. here are some pictures, tak ikut turutan sbb i mls nak drag2, so yeah.













kitorg agak lucky la sbb memg tak hujan, cume mase kitorg nak turun balik tu hujan yg agak lebat jugak la. tp ok la. singgah mines, ingat nak tgk papadom. tp tiket malam la pulak. so balik rumah dulu, mandi sembahyang sume, pastu pkul 8.15 kuar gi mines balik. tiket kol 8.30. haha. mentang2 la dekat kan. asib baik parking pun agak senang la.

dan mase tgk wayang, huh. i was sooo unfortunate to be seated beside a couple. bukan masalah nye kene dok sblh couple tu. masalahnye i dok sebelah si boyfren n man, his mouth stinks! bau busuk gile weh. bercakap pun bau. pastu boleh die burp pulak! 2 kali pulak tu! ya rabbi, i memg dh nak muntah dah kat situ. dah buwek2 dah, luckily tak kuar pape. so throughout the movie i tutup hidung dgn sweater. langsung tak bleh nak concentrate tgk cite. rcf^&WC/.';/mrnym/'.; punye org. yang pelik tu, awek die yang baring kat bahu die boleh tak bau, padahal neya yg dok selang satu seat (seat i la) boleh bau. btol la. cinta memg buta. pekak. bisu. takde sebarang sense at all. huhu. i rase mcm nak offer clorets je kt die. tp malas la takut die offended n jadi gaduh la pulak. so i suffered in silence la. haih. rugi jek rm10.

so thats about that. one whole day berjalan, pkul 11 dah tak mampu nak bukak mata. tido tak terjaga sampai la pkul 10. hahahahaha.

crap crappier crappiest.

salam.

hello.

sebenarnye setiap kali i bace others' blogs i akan buka page create post ni n start writing updates, tp setiap kali pun i akan stop writing sbb i tak cukup idea tatau nak tulis ape. same thing happens here, i baru lepas bloghopping -akmar,mira,hanis zalikha,farini,amal,zalikha,etc- n i opened this page n i started writing. lets hope i tak stop halfway when my ideas stop flowing n this entry will become draft n i will delete it 3 days later, not bothering to continue writing.

oh. i memg tak suke stop separuh jalan dn sambung balik. dalam apa2 perkara pun. kalo i buat keje separuh jalan, memg sampai situ je la i buat. memg tak akan sambung. that's why i tried very hard not to do things halfway. when i start, i finish. so before i start working on things, i akan pastikan i dah mandi, dah solat, dah makan, n dah buat everything so that bila i dah start duduk depan laptop n do my work, i dont have to bangun n do something else. i even akan letak satu botol air mineral by my side so everytime i haus, i dont have to get out of my room to get some water. sebab tu la i suke buat keje after isyak. pukul 10 malam baru start buat keje. n khairul selalunya akan jadi sgt2 understanding bila i banyak keje, he will call me just to say good night n let me finish my work without any disturbance.

n i think, i work my best while under pressure. usually people tak bleh concentrate bile under pressure n start to mess things up, but thats not my case. me, i need pressure to work. n i work wonders under pressure too. ok maybe not your kind of wonders. but its enough for me, as long as i can get atleast 9/10 in every assignment, n that's always the case. i concentrate when im stressed. haha. i know im a weirdo. but i dont care. everybody has their own way to do things n this is my way.

n my working environment? i need quiet. dead-of-night kind of quiet. its different when studying, i can study in whatever condition. i can study while watching tv, i surely can study while listening to my playlist, i can study in a crowd of people shouting to each other. all those sounds wont bother me, i even feel a lil bit weird studying without any sounds at all. but working, no. i need quiet. so when i have piles of work to do, i go to the library n sit in the quiet section (its block a in psas upm). or i'll start working at 10pm. sbb mase tu memg dah senyap. ok tolak la bunyi all those vehicles kat highway n erl n komuter. benda tu bukan kita boleh control pon. haha.

since this time its about me, here are some random things about me that u might not know n u wont even bother to know but i'll post it here anyway.

- i make the bed before i went to bed. i akan 'jeng' kan my bedsheet, fold my blanket, n position my pillows accordingly sebelum i lie down. haha. what's the point, i know. tp i tak selesa tido kalo cadar tu crumple2. kalo i dah baring tp i rase cadar tu mcm tak terpasang dengan betul n mcm longgar2 jek, i akan bangun dn betulkan cadar, no matter how sleepy i am. haha. weirdo. i know.

- sebelum i tido, i'll read. anything good. from novels to magazine. but im not a magazine type, so its always a novel. at least 3 pages. its like my own sleeping ritual.

- i sleep with atleast 2 books. literally. on the bed with me. haha.

- a week before my menstrual, i'll eat a lot. a lot. cant stop munching.

- sejak2 i dok umah sewa n masak, i tak pernah kesah dgn how much money i hv inside my purse. pernah tu i cume ade rm4 for two weeks. i will only withdraw the money bile i nak isi minyak kete, nak bayar sewa rumah, nak beli barang dapur or nak pg jalan2. haha. nak buat ape simpan cash byk2. bukan nk gune pon. emergency? visa kan ade. haha.

- i tak pandai menawar. i rase segan nak tawar2 harga. kalo harga barang tu rm50, itu la yg i bayar. bile pg shopping dgn sape2 pun, kalo org tu start bargaining, i akan pg tempat lain. menyorok celah2 tudung ke. sbb i segan. haha. i think its an inherited trait la. i tak pernah nmpk my mom or my dad bargaining gile2 smpi mcm nak gaduh dgn org kedai tu. paling2 pun 2, 3 kali mintak kurang, pastu dah. itu pun kalo harga die ridiculous gile. mak kate, setiap rezeki tu ade bahagian org lain. kan ke kalo kite meniaga, untung kite tak bleh lebih dpd 50% harga barang? jadi i percaya je la dgn makcik2 jual tudung kat kedai tu.kesian pulak nak tawar2. hahaha.

hahahaha. so that, are some random facts about me. boring tho it might seems, tp sukati i la. i bukan blogging sbb nak cerita pasal some political issue. i hate politics by the way. i bukan blogging sbb i nak komen pasal budget 2010 or harga minyak baik or some other issue. there are enough blogger out there who write about that. i bukan blogging sbb nak promote barang. i blog, sbb i nak blog. bcz i love writing crappy things. bcz i love talking about myself. bcz i want to share things i do, i did.

so for some people yg rase its not worth reading my blog bcz its not 'berilmu' or 'berfaedah', stop reading. i dont remember inviting u. tp for some of others yg tak kesah pon. u are soo welcomed. welcome to read, welcome to share thought, welcome to tegur me if i did something wrong.

there. i finished writing. after a lot of crappy talking. haha.

takde motif.

salam. sbenarnya i ada byk keje nak kene siapkan mlm ni, tp sbb im soo sleepy n am waiting for the caffeine to kick in, i decided to write an entry. but i didnt decide what am i going to write about, so i guess we'll just go random je lah.

1. i nak ucap tahniah sgt2 dkt my besterestest fren, nahar yg dh diterima bekerja as a reseach engineer (if im not mistaken) dkt proton, shah alam. i am sooo very proud of you. finally u dpt jugak keje yg u suke. alhamdulillah.

2. i tgh rase risau sgt skrg sbb i dh terbuat satu kesalahn yg menentukan hidup dn mati i dlm program master ni. skrg i just hope for the best and prepare for the worse. sbb i know, memg i yg salah. tsk.

3. i rase i dh gemuk sgt skrg. gemuk sgt. dh terase diri sendiri berat nak bwk. haha tipu. tp memg i rase dh gemuk sgt. maka i skrg tgh berkire2 untuk start dieting. tp blom research lagi. haha. i miss my matric self. i want that weight again!

4. i tak sabar nk tunggu new moon kuar.

5. minggu depan i nk gi pasang rear seatbelt kat mr bird. euw i know that sounds so dirty, but its not. mr bird is my car. kenari? bird? can u see the resemblance? ahahahahahaha.

6. i need to shop for new clothes!!!!!!!!!!!!

7. dah takde idea.

oklah bye.

broken hearted.

You’re everything I thought you never were
And nothing like I thought you could’ve been
But still you live inside of me
So tell me how is that?

You’re the only one I wish I could forget
The only one I’d love to not forgive
And though you break my heart, you’re the only one
And though there are times when I hate you
Cause I can’t erase
The times that you hurt me
And put tears on my face
And even now while I hate you
It pains me to say
I know I’ll be there at the end of the day

I don’t wanna be without you babe
I don’t want a broken heart
Don’t wanna take a breath with out you babe
I don’t wanna play that part
I know that I love you
But let me just say
I don’t want to love you in no kind of way no no
I don’t want a broken heart
And I don’t wanna play the broken-hearted girl...No...No
No broken-hearted girl
I’m no broken-hearted girl

Something that I feel I need to say
But up to now I’ve always been afraid
That you would never come around
And still I want to put this out
You say you’ve got the most respect for me
But sometimes I feel you’re not deserving me
And still you’re in my heart
But you’re the only one and yes
There are times when I hate you
But I don’t complain
Cause I’ve been afraid that you would've walk away
Oh but now I don’t hate you
I’m happy to say
That I will be there at the end of the day

I don’t wanna be without you babe
I don’t want a broken heart
Don’t wanna take a breath with out you babe
I don’t wanna play that part
I know that I love you
But let me just say
I don’t want to love you in no kind of way no no
I don’t want a broken heart
And I don’t wanna play the broken-hearted girl...No…No
No broken-hearted girl

Now I’m at a place I thought I’d never be…Oooo
I’m living in a world that’s all about you and me…yeah
Ain't gotta be afraid my broken heart is free
To spread my wings and fly away
Away With you
yeah yeah yeah, ohh ohh ohh

I don’t wanna be without my baby
I don’t wanna a broken heart
Don’t want to take a breath with out my baby
I don’t wanna play that part
I know that I love you
But let me just say
I don’t want to love you in no kind of way..No..No
I don’t want a broken heart
I don’t wanna play the broken-hearted girl..No..No..
No broken-hearted girl
Broken-hearted girl No…no…
No broken-hearted girl
No broken-hearted girl

Broken hearted girl - beyonce

hmm.

ok2. i dh tau dh. blog memg dh penuh dgn sawang. buat ape ade blog kalo tak bleh nk update every other day kan? ok maybe bukan every other day, tp sure la bukan 2 minggu sekali kan. haha. i memg tgh agak busy kot skrg ni, sbb sem dh nk abes kan. so assignments sume kene submit, plus i hv an interview. technically i wasnt being interviewed, but yeah. whatever lah.

the interview, i mean, my INSAK test went quite well. oh i think God would forgive me for being such a hypocrite bitch while answering those Qs. bukannye ape, kalo i jujur segala kan, confirm la i tak lulus that test kan? so terpaksala hipokrit dn mengaku yg baik2 saja. contoh soalan yg ridiculous,

1. adab makan saya adalah berbeza di rumah dan di luar. ( i mean, ape kene mengena2 perbezaan adab makan dgn jadi cikgu?)

2. saya tidak akan berkongsi buku yang anda pinjam walaupun ia mengandungi maklumat penting. (ok yg ni i serious confuse. saya? anda?)

serious, kalau someone dpd my faculty yg expert pasal instrument development bace soalan2 dlm buku pink ni, confirm diorg akan suruh kementerian buat semula. betul. sekejap saya, sekejap anda, confuse. bukan ke personality test ni adalah a type of survey? dn mengikut ape yg i dh belaja slnjg sem ni, instrument tak bleh mengelirukan respondent. maka kalau i salah faham dn fail, then u cannot blame me. blame the confusing questions, n whoever developed them (defensive mode).

ntah la. i tatau nk tulis ape lagi. kepala asyik fikir pasal assignments prof habibah yg nak antar esok. ptg ni anta assignment dr othman. esok pun nak exam research method, ape pun tak bace lagi. haih.