sungguh tidak cool.

now my mood is soo not cool.

why?

bcz i am not fasting.

i am healthy and not period, but i am not fasting.

bcz apparently the doctors think that i am not healthy enough to fast.

all bcz of this vomiting thing.

n they prescribed me with a 7-days course of antibiotics, to be taken every 6 hours.

bcz i have an infection somewhere in my stomach or intestine or something.

but the vomiting didnt stop, which means that i dont have this infection or anything, right?

which also means that the doctors were wrong, n i get to do the fasting, right?

oh, n i was pretty upset when they told me i only have an infection somewhere inside my abdomen, when at times, i literally cant stop vomiting ( like hiccups, u know, when u cant control it n it keep coming n all) n i literally muntah hijau ( i dont know the medical terms for that, the kind lady doctor said that it was my gallbladder juice coming out from my gallbladder to my stomach bcz i keep vomiting but i didnt have anything inside me to be thrown up, i myself never thought that muntah hijau is even existed).

u'd think im mad for expecting something more, bizarre.

but this vomiting thing had been going on for quite sometimes now, n im dying to know what is it inside my stomach that keeps rejecting every form of food i tried to put in.

oh please doctors, please put some cameras inside my stomach already n get this vomiting thing stops!

bcz honestly, men can only stand for so much pain.

n now its 3.53am n i cannot sleep.



but still, its ramadhan, n i have to work harder on my patience n temper, right?

so i will be patient. or i will try, at least.

Tuhan takkan bagi dugaan lebih daripada kemampuan hamba-Nya, right?

Oh God, please help me. U give me the pain, n its U, n only U, who can make it better. Please God, please lend me Your strength to survive this.

Amin.

ps: my mom thinks i might got H1N1, n my dad told me to stay away from mamak's food. my cousin thinks i might have tumor in my gut, my housemate thinks that the symptoms are almost like colon's cancer. n my boyfriend, well, he said that he always knew that there's something really wrong inside me, n he agrees with whatever theories others got, as long as it makes me go to the hospital. im soo surrounded by my own, private doctors. but its ok. they care, n that's what matters. =)

tatau la.

salam.

hari ni right after lab pkul 5, solat asar, withdraw duit, i nk cabut balik johor.

sebenarnye bleh je nk balik tomorrow first thing in the morning, tp dah gatal sgt rindu kat khairul, so nk balik ari ni jugak. walaupun itu bermakna i kene berbuka puasa bersama driver bus di dalam bus di atas lebuh raya highway.

so i think i'll be out for a while (ceh care ckp mcm tiap2 hari post 8 entry je).

mesti sgt sejuk dlm bus nt kan.

estimated time arrival: 11pm. the earliest.

takpe. i dh prepare 1 shawl, 2 sweater, 1 pair socks n jeng jeng jeng! 1 quilt cover which i never intended to use dlm bus nt sbb mcm org tak betul je dlm bus pakai quilt cover?

tak sabar nk balik.

ish. kalo takde lab ni, smlm i dh cabut.

assalamualaikum.

hari ke....10 (kot) puasa.

dah hari ke 10 dah. kalo ikut kalendar,19 hari lg nk raye. 19 hari lg weh.

since hari khamis hari tu, i ade sindrom pas makan je muntah. bygkan betapa frustrated dn annoying nye bile kite seronok berbuka dn bersahur n 10 minutes after that, everything will go down the toilet bowl. mulenye memg la tak suspect pape. dn hari jumaat, i rase mcm serdang adalah tempat paling sejuk dlm dunia. i know, i know, memg tak. tp i kene pakai socks n sweater sbb memg sejuk gile. my table fan pun on kat level 1 jek. itu pun dh goose bumps all over the place sbb sejuk sgt. smpi smlm (sunday) i dh tak bleh pijak lantai without any alas bcz my feet will hurt n kinda ngilu. bygkan betape sejuknye i. dn mlm smlm before tido, i pun mcm bese la bergayut kat fon dgn khairul. n i put my lengan on my forehead. after a while, i angkat, pastu tempat yg ade contact dgn dahi tu merah mcm melecur. pastu i pun kate, ' eh aku ni demam ke?'. mcm pelik sbb i ni jenis kalo demam akan flat terus kat katil memg dh mengada2 tamo bgn dh smpi demam kebah. ni bleh g masak tgk tv enjoy men facebook blogging lg. n khairul pun suruh i telan panadol ( thank God i memg ade supply panadol, PK kalo prescribe ubat kat i, mcm i ni nk mati besok) n terus tido. mase tido, mimpi merapu dh satu hal, terjaga every 30minutes or so lg 1 hal, dn bile bgn, i berpeluh despite my coldness. hish, ni memg kompem demam ni. dn pg td after sahur, i telan panadol lg 2 biji, dn 1 gelas choc milk. smoga itu akan sufficient untuk provide i dgn energy spnjg hari ni (ceh mula la nk lupe lemak2 tepu yg sedia ade).

jap. i dengar ade group budak2 india menjerit kat bwh. kecoh. ok dh takde.

dn since mlm td is mlm merdeka, bunyi motor kat highway bwh ni bertalu2. i ni dh la asyik terjaga jek. mengganggu btol org nk tido. cit. tu blum lg dgr siren ambulance ke polis ntah yg lalu every one hour or so. annoying huh? bt i hv to live with it. sape soh sewa umah sblh highway? sblh railway komuter? sblh rail erl? padan muka.

ok. skrg dh azan. i nk solat subuh. pastu nk tido balik. i bace kat blog ni yg kalo bulan puasa bleh tido lepas subuh. syaitan sume kene penjara, tak bleh nk selimut kite dgn kulit babi. hee. mcm2. sbnrnye kene tido. i baru pas mkn panadol. doktor kate pas mkn panadol soh tido. baru cepat baik (byk gile alasan weh nk tido balik pas subuh).

till then.

assalamualaikum.

dream guy.

not in my case, tho. he's a dream come true. =P

Now, here's what you're supposed to do, and please do not spoil the fun. Copy and paste this into your notes, delete my answers, type in your answers and tag 20 of your friends here in facebook to answer this. Then see what happens.

1. Do you need him/her to be good looking?
sesedap mate memandang.

2. Smart?
he's smart. not too-smart. ok-smart.ehe.

3. Preferred age?
he's older by a year.

4. Preferred height?
he's taller.

5. How about sense of humor?
he was born with it.

6. How about piercings?
takde.

7. Accepts you for who you are?
yes.most of the time.

8. Pink hair?
hihi.tak kot.i think he'll stick with black.

9. Mushy or no?
kdg2 mushy jugak kot. =P

10. Thin or fat?
he used to be soo thin.tp skrg dh berisi skit.mcm saye.cume saye gemuk lg.hee.

11. Black, Brown or White (skin color)?
he's darker.skit la.

12. Long hair or short hair?
smart hair.

13. Plastic or metal?
err,meaning?

14. Smells good?
oh yes he did smell soo good.

15. Smoker?
dh berhenti kot.

16. Drinker?
nope.

17. Girl/Boy-next-door type?
bleh bwk diri type.

18. Muscular?
hihi.sedap2 peluk la.

19. Plays piano?
i wish.

20. Plays bass and/or acoustic guitar?
acoustic.kot.

21. Plays violin?
err..nope.

22. Sings very good?
err.... pass. =P

23. Vain?
errr...pass.for better future.hii.

24. With glasses?
yep.he is soo cute bleh pakai spec.nmpk lebih.......sexy.ahaha.

25. With braces?
oh no.

26. Shy type?
bleh bwk diri type.

27. Rebel or good boy/girl?
both.

28. Active or passive?
sgt aktif.

29. Tight or bomb?
ahaha.

30. Singer or dancer?
none.

31. stunner?
ehehe.

32. Hiphop?
no.

33. Earrings?
no way.

34. Mr/Ms. count-my-ex-girlfriends-until-you-drop?

no.

35. Dimples?
takde kot.tp kalo ade mesti comel.

36. Bookworm?
hopefully,so that we can share the same hobby.

37. Mr/Ms. love letter?
ehehehe.

38. Playful?
yes.super.

39. Flirt?
ye.terutamanye dgn makcik jual blouse.nk mintak murah.ahaha.

40. Poem writer?
thank God no.

41. Serious?
i need him to be serious.sometimes.

43. Painter?
nope.

44. Religious?
yes.

45. Someone who likes to tease people?
oh he loves to tease people.sgt suke menyakat.

46. Computer games geek? Or internet freak?
computer games geek.super geek.

47. Speaks 20 languages?
no he is not edward cullen.

48. Loyal or faithful?
both!

49. good kisser?
ehem2 ;)

50. loves children?
of course.

top four.

Once you've been tagged, you are needed to fill the questions below. Four answers for each question.

FOUR NAMES THAT FRIENDS CALL YOU:
aniz -- yuhaniz -- yuha --yuyu (ni kalo dtg aifaa nye gedik.hee.).

FOUR MOST IMPORTANT DATES IN YOUR LIFE:
my mom's bday -- my dad's bday -- our bday -- my wedding day.

FOUR THINGS YOU'VE DONE IN THE LAST 30 MINUTES:
facebook -- blogging -- buat tag -- mkn tembikai.

FOUR WAYS FOR YOU TO BE HAPPY:

shopping (mental therapy) -- talking to my mom -- talking to him -- reading good novels.

FOUR PEOPLE YOU MISS FROM YOUR PAST:
nani (classmate djh 6) -- 1 rka 1 2001 -- best fivers batch 19, 20 & 21 -- cerdikerz 2003.

FOUR GIFTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE:
books n novels of my own choice -- macbook air -- new phone (bcz i dun wanna waste my money,my current phone is still in perfect condition.or n its apple iphone, preferably. =P) -- a house.

FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
reading -- facebooking -- blogging (tho im not a frequent blogger) -- n sleeping of course.

FOUR PLACES YOU WANT TO GO FOR VACATION
venice -- karambunai -- bali -- balik kampung.ehe.

FOUR OF YOUR FAVOURITE DRINKS:
air masak -- air masak -- air masak -- air masak.

FOUR THINGS ALWAYS FOUND IN YOUR BAG:
clorets -- phone -- purse -- kunci kete n kunci umah.

FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE COLOR
white -- black -- lilac -- apple green.

TOP FOUR HANGOUTS:
home -- home -- home -- home. im a homey person.

TOP FOUR YOU LOVE SO MUCH:
there are jz so many things that i love i cudnt even list them!

TOP FOUR "THINGS" SPECIAL TO YOU:
err... pass.

TOP FOUR WHY YOU ANSWERED THIS SURVEY:
saje2 -- buang mase -- saje2 -- buang mase.

err...wedding plan?

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with d wedding plan! At the end, choose d people u want to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know about u! =)


1. how old are you?
twentytwo and counting.

2. are you single?
yes i am..not single!

3. at what age do you think you'll get married?
twentythree?hihi.

4. do you think you'll marry the person you are with now?
i think i will.

5. if not, who do you want to marry?
khairul fadzli samat.

6. who will be your bridesmaid & bestman?
maid of honor: ain my kezen. bestman? its up to him, i guess.

7. do you want a garden/beach or traditional wedding?
garden is ok,beach is better, but i think mine will be the traditional without all the crappy adat. sgt leceh, u know, whats with the bersanding berinai tepung tawar n all. i'll make it as simple as possible.

8. where do you plan to go on honeymoon?
a place with lots of coral where i get to snorkel!

9. how many guests do you think you'll invite?
40 people.that's the most.if its up to me.only closest frens n relatives, u know.but i hv a huge family, so i think i will let my mom to decide.

10. will that include your exes?
which one?hihi.

11. how many layers of cake do you want?
satu saja.

12. when do you want to get married, morning or evening?
rase mcm nk buat mlm.mcm best je kan?hihi.

13. name the song/tune you'd like to play at your wedding..
im not ready with the playlist, yet, but it will sure has mariah carey's in it.

14. ur wedding colour theme?
white.white.n white.

15. do you prefer fine dining or just normal?
fine dining,since i dont want to bersanding and all.at least the guests can have a glimpse on the bride n the groom.hee.

16. champagne or red wine?
sirap bandung dgn ice cream soda.heaven.

17. honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
weeks after.

18. money or household items?
if u dont hv money then u cant have the household items right?

19. how many kids would you like to have?
i want 3 but he wants 4.i dont know.depends pd rezeki.

20. will you record your honeymoon in DVD/CD?
for most part,yes.

21. ur dream present fr0m ur future husband
i think i will pass this one.

22. who do u want to tag?
tamo tag sape2.sape2 nk buat pun bleh.

menyibuk konvo org.

~KONVO AIN~

~KONVO KHAIRUL~

MY KONVO?

hihi.later.

mari buang masa.

1. Bekas kekasih saya adalah :
satu baik,satu tak baik.

2. Saya sedang mendengar:
bunyi vehicle kat highway bwh.

3. Mungkin saya patut:
bace journal article untuk literature review.

4. Saya suka :
tido.

5.Sahabat-sahabat baik saya :
tak ramai.

6.Saya tak paham :
knp sy asyik sakit perut je pastu muntah.

7.Saya kehilangan :
sepit rambut setiap kali beli.

8.Ramai yang berkata :
sy jahat.

9.Makna nama saya :
seriously saya tak tau.

10.Cinta itu adalah :
komitmen.

11.Di suatu tempat, seseorang sedang :
takut untuk call sy sbb smlm sy mrh die asyik sgt main game.

12.Saya akan cuba :
membace lebih byk journal article.

13.Ayat SELAMANYA membawa maksud :
smpi bila-bila.

14.Telefon bimbit saya :
dah tuka dpd warna pink jd warna merah.still the same model.

15.Bila saya terjaga dari tidur :
sy akan kelam kabut cari jam nk tgk dh pkul berape.

16.Saya paling meluat apabila :
jumpe dgn org know-it-all yg annoying dn org yg asyik nk kene jage hati die jek.

17.Pesta/Parti adalah :
crowded dn buat sy pening kepala.

18.Haiwan yang paling comel yang saya pernah temui ialah :
hamster.

19.Peringkat umur yang paling menyeronokkan bagi saya ialah :
skrg.sy ade die.sy ade housemates yg cool.sy ade kwn2 yg best.sy ade family yg supportive.

20.Hari ini :
hari ke lapan puasa kot.

21.Malam ini saya akan :
tlg makcik sy buat biskut raye.

22.Esok pula saya akan :
tlg makcik sy buat biskut raye.

23.Saya betul-betul inginkan :
hidup yg close to perfect.

24.Ketika anda lihat wajah anda di hadapan cermin pagi ini :
tak perasan ape2 sbb mamai.

25.Pusat membeli-belah atau arked permainan :
midvalley kot sbb sume ade dn affordable.n maybe ikea sbb byk bende cantik2.

26.Makanan Barat atau Jepun
malay.preferably mom's cooking.

27.Bilik yang terang atau gelap :
depends pd mood.

28.Makanan segera adalah :
sdp dn menggemukkan.

29.Ayat terakhir yang anda katakan pada seseorang?
taknak : pd along.

30.Siapa yang anda nak Tag?
takde sape2.

dah 2 hari buka dgn lauk msk sendiri.

smlm, i mean 2 days ago, msk kari ayam (even i impress dgn rase kari tu yg ckup garam walaupun tak bleh rase sbb puasa), goreng papadam bulat (yg mcm kat kdi mamak tu,bukan yg 4 segi ade gelembung2 tu) dgn sayur kobis+carrot goreng.pastu along balik bwk smbl tempe (along adalah peminat tempe lebih dpd i yg memg terang2 org johor ni) smbil mulut mengomel dgn harge.rm3,tp seciput gile.but when i start to think about it, rasenye memg bazar ramadhan serdang kali ni agak pricey la.bayangkan my favourite kuih, kole kacang dijual dgn harga rm 1 for 3 pieces.nk mkn pun tak puas.tp i beli jugak la sbb mesti nk buka puasa dgn bende manis kan. n smlm msk nasi goreng hijau (sbb pakai cili padi,nk panggil nasi goreng kampung rasenye lom qualified lg.ehe) dn sup ayam.along balik beli lauk lg,2 jenis.sambal paru dgn smbl kerang.

and hari ni dh masuk hari ke-enam puasa.pejam celik dah 6 hari.rase sekejap sgt.tp i think ive read it from somewhere, yg kate tande2 kiamat dh dekat (oh kiamat sudah dekat lalala) adlh kite rase mase berlalu dgn cepat (correct me if im wrong).dn tatau lg nk masak ape.i dun hv any trouble with cooking.oh,i dun mean trouble 'trouble', as in trouble tak pandai masak or takut kuali meletup or takut minyak panas terkena kat tgn. my mom had me taught enuf not to be afraid dgn those things. u'll know if u knew my mom. ahaha. what i mean with trouble is, i tak rase susah pun nk msk. maybe my housemates rase mcm susahkan i sbb masak untuk buka, tp i x kesah pun. bukan ke menyediakan mknn untuk org berpuasa tu besar pahalanya? n i dun actually mind if i hv to kemas rumah every other day, sbb i always do that at home. pontian. my house is much bigger than this one in serdang, n i hv to tidy it up by myself anyway, so i see no trouble in cleaning up this house. plus i am the one who sits at home the most, so what else i can do to fill my time? n i love my housemates. i dun mind troubling myself for them, bcz i know they always n will always do the same for me.

tp yg menjadi mslh stiap kali nk msk is thinking about what to cook. kdg2 smpi i bersila dkt dpn fridge sbb tatau nk msk ape. uhu. contohnya hari ni punye buka puasa. baru 2 hari msk, hari ni dh habis idea dh. ape ye nk msk? or shud i pg bazar je dn beli nasi lemak yg harge rm4 tu? sungguh tidak cool kan makcik tu jual nasi lemak smpi rm4. dn i boleh habiskan nasi lemak tu, maksudnye nasi lemak tu takdela byk mane. bygkan kalo i yg stiap kali perut terlebih penuh akan sedekahkan sume isi perut i pd toilet bowl ni masih boleh habiskan nasi lemak tu tanpa termuntah, adakah nasi lemak itu ckup untuk golongan2 yg mkn byk, contohnye kaum adam? haih. zaman skrg org sukahati je nk amek untung. diorg tatau ke kalo berniaga tu, untung yg bleh kite amek tak bleh lebih dpd 50% dpd mdal or harga brg? tu la. len kali dok johor. masuk skolah agama. blajar muamalat.

was thinking of visiting khairul next weekend. i rase sem ni, i yg salu trun sane. sbb dulu mase i dok kolej, ade la kwn2 die yg same2 dok kolej dgn i, contohnye tiong dgn faiz. so die bleh la dok bilik diorg. or afif, dkt k10. he might as well tido umah atok die kat kepong or pakcik die kat gombak, tp ape plak diorg kate kalo every month die trun sini, tumpang tido umah diorg but spend the most of his time with me? so sem ni, since i dh tak dok kolej, so i hv to do the visiting. sbb my favourite cousin, ain, masih lg blajar kat sane n conveniently, blok die opposite dgn blok khairul. sng nk pg sahur same, buka puasa same, n terawih same. n i dun mind naik bus almost 9 hours pegi balik , sbb selama ni die buat sume tu for me, n never once yg die mengeluh. bcz he likes it when im around. ehehe. relationship ni memg long distance, we never studied at the same place except for high school. matrik tak same, uni pun lain. but somehow bleh survive for almost 4 years.

okay.enuf for today, rase lagi mengarut kalo trus membebel. sbnrnye sakit kepala sbb bgn terkejut mase sahur pg td, sbb bgn2 je jam dh pkul 5.15. kelam kabut bgn. uhu.

till then.

assalamualaikum.

tarikh2 penting 2009.

august:
31st:merdeka.

september:
20th:raya.
24th:first episode grey's anatomy season 6.

october:
3rd:bday aman.my clasmet mase form 3.

november:
20th:movie new moon.
30th:ana (farhana my exrumet) nikah.

dicember:
1st:ana sanding.

ramadhan.

hari ketiga berpuasa.

dan i am so grateful n thankful.

sbb gastrik masih blum menyerang.

n hopefully will mercifully stay away from me for the rest of the month, if not for life.

ok.mungkin the vomitting n the nausea thing still happens,but i rase bersyukur sgt2 sbb perut tak pedih smpi i hv to buka puasa.kalo ordinary day,if i missed 2 hours top from my eating schedule,i'll end up curling on my bed with the smell of minyak yu yee cap limau spread out all over the room.my stomach just cannot take it.

n that's why im so truly grateful sbb masih lg dikurniakan kesihatan untuk menunaikan ibadah puasa dn terawih.

quoting khairul,
"keberkatan bulan ramadhan sayang."

dn sgt bersyukur masih mampu bangun stiap kali alarm fon berbunyi jam 4.45am (my fon's clock is always 10minutes earlier) to fix the sahur n to actually eat the sahur.kalo dulu,mase dok kolej,kdg2 punye la mls nk bgn sahur smpikan bile alarm fon bunyi,i'll grab a bottle of mineral water n drink for like 2 gulps n then i went back to sleep.but now,i can even cook the sayur n heat the food, n eat sahur.

n one more thing ramadhan did to me.

sembahyang isyak awal waktu.

usually i will solat isyak around 11pm,sebelum tido.n even later if i ade keje or engaged dgn something.selalu sgt kene tegur dgn khairul,he always told me to dahulukan bende yg wajib.tp ramadhan makes me rase sgt perlu untuk solat isyak on time,cz i want to perform my terawih after that.yes,im performing my terawih alone,in my room.bcz around my house memg takde any nearby mosque or surau yg accomodate this solat terawih berjemaah,the nearest is masjid upm,which is like 5 minutes away by car,not including the trafic light.uhu.sekiranya ade kesempatan dn peluang,i would love to go terawih there.haih.

semoga kebaikan dn keberkatan bulan ramadhan akan terus melimpahi kami.amin.

ps:secretly pray that i will hv the opportunity to actually fasting for the complete whole month this year.amin.

alhamdulillah.

something to think about.

Is it possible for a girl that is happily coupled, in a stable relationship with a guy she falls deeply in love with, who loves her back the way she loves him, to fall in love with a guy that has been her bestfriend for years?

It's wrong for her to feel that way, given she already had a commitment and already planning to get married and all, but is it really her fault if she cant exactly help how she feels?

In other words,

is it possible for a girl to love two men at the same time?




I will post the story letter, a true story from only-i-know-who, about a girl who feels so miserable for falling for two guys at the same time. Now i wanna get some sleep, for tommorow is the first day of Ramadhan babeh! So i have to wake up early to fix sahur n all. N i want to take this opportunity to wish u all

selamat menjalankan ibadah puasa

dan semoga Ramadhan tahun ini memberi seribu keberkatan buat kita semua.

jgn lupa terawih yek.

till then.

Lenka - The Show

click on the title to listen to the song.

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

Slow it down
Make it stop
Or else my heart is going to pop
'Cause it's too much
Yeah, it's a lot
To be something I'm not

I'm a fool
Out of love
'Cause I just can't get enough

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

The sun is hot
In the sky
Just like a giant spotlight
The people follow the sign
And synchronize in time
It's a joke
Nobody knows
They've got a ticket to that show
Yeah

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

Just enjoy the show

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

dum de dum
dudum de dum

Just enjoy the show

dum de dum
dudum de dum

Just enjoy the show

I want my money back
I want my money back
I want my money back
Just enjoy the show

I want my money back
I want my money back
I want my money back
Just enjoy the show

Your Guardian Angel - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

click on the title to listen to the song.

When I see your smile, tears roll down my face. I can't replace.

And now that I'm strong, I have figured out,
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul.
And I know, I'll find, deep inside me, I can be the one.

I will never let you fall.
I'll stand up with you forever.
I'll be there for you through it all.
Even if saving you sends me to heaven.

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.

Seasons are changing and waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us.
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter,
I can show you I'll be the one.

I will never let you fall.
I'll stand up with you forever.
I'll be there for you through it all.
Even if saving you sends me to heaven.
[Your Guardian Angel lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]

'Cause you're my, you're my, my, my, my true love,
My whole heart, please don't throw that away.
Because I am here, for you.
Please don't walk away, and please tell me you'll stay.

Whoa-oh-oh
Stay
Whoa-oh-oh

Use me as you will, pull my strings just for a thrill.
And I know I'll be okay, though my skies are turning gray.

I will never let you fall.
I'll stand up with you forever.
I'll be there for you through it all.
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

exam lagi.

hari ni ade exam.

statistic in education.

ye.statistic.yg sgt complicated tu.

dah buat master pun ade lagi test smpi 2 paper seminggu.

doakan i bleh jwb cepat dn bleh kuar cepat.

mcm paper research method selase lepas.

i was the second person to submit the answer sheet.

knp?

bcz the longer i duduk dgn paper tu, the more liquid paper yg akan i bazirkan.

ahaha.

so pray for me.

thank you.

pembayaran saman parking oleh org yg tidak pernah disaman.

uhu.i tau blog telah tidak diupdate dgn berjayenye.sbb2 tidak pengupdate -tan:

1. my laptop n my broadband modem telah dicurik dgn jayenye oleh pencurik yg telah masuk kerumah.disamping itu,along juge telah kehilangan laptopnye dan cash nye sbyk rm650.maka mari kite same2 doakan kebinasaan kpd pencurik2 durjana itu.

2. oleh kerana ketiadaan laptop dan modem broadband,i mls nk gi cc or pinjam laptop neya untuk update sbb tade feel la nk update blog dkt tempat2 ramai org.

3. sgt bizi dgn bende2 jadah yg perlu dibuat semula from scratch hasil dpd kehilangan laptop berharga kpd perompak2 durjana tersebut.

4. malas nk update.

this morning i went to academic sbb nk pulangkan jubah yg dah lmbt dipulangkan menyebabkan i have to pay rm20 as the denda.ok la.i dah prepare dh sbb memg niat nt pulang lewat pun.dn dukacitanye semasa membayar denda di bendahari,ive been informed that i ada saman tertunggak sebanyak rm50 atas kesalahan parking!i pun wonder la,dulu my sticker atas name along,so kalo i slh parking pun,along yg kene bayar kan?plus i tak pnh dpt pun ape2 surat kat my car yg menyatakan i dah di saman sbb salah parking.ok i admit yg i memg salu cilok tmpt parking,but so far tak pnh la kene tahan dgn pak guard ke mak guard ke whatsoever.dah la dgn bahagianye kakak kaunter tu ckp:

"adik,adik ade hutang saman parking ni.rm 50.adik tak bleh amek transkrip kalo tak byr saman ni."

what the F???nasib baik bwk extra money.i pun byr la sbb mls nk cite pnjg,i mls nk gi akademik byk kali sbb tak suke dgn makcik kat kaunter akademik tu.nasib baik la kakak tu sgt baik dn ckp baik2 je.

oleh itu,dgn perasaan bengangnye,i nk ckp kat sini,sape2 yg dh gune my name nk apply sticker kete pastu dgn jayanye telah disaman dgn pak guard lalu lupe diri dan tidak membayara saman tersebut,sesungguhnya u telah berjayenye menjadi such a huge pain in my a** dgn menyusahkan i membayar saman parking anda.maka paham2 la sendiri.msg me for my account number.i mls nk reveal name sape2 kat sini,i tak suke malukan org.sorila,u tau my patience pun memg tak byk kan.enuf is enuf.u owe me so much.so so much.

sila sampaikan kpd kawan2 anda.

pagi yang cerah.

cehceh.gile optimis punye title.

technically,pagi ni tak berape nk cerah la sbb dh beberape minggu ni udara di serdang ni di selaputi dgn haze.ye.haze.jerebu.nape yek?kalo salu bukak tingkap every time bgn pagi bleh nmpk la bangunan K10 (or is it engineering?both kot) tu dgn sungguh clear.tp semenjak due menjak ni nmpk samar2 di sebalik kelabu2 sepoi2 bahasa.patut la housemate2 sume beria nk recycle.sume tin2 sardin,mushroom n prego dikumpul.termasukla botol sos.eheh.sbnrnye diorg buat master on some sort of environmental thingy yg required them to kutip all the air sampah dkt tempat2 pelupusan sampah.so semangat nk recycle pun dtg berkobar2 sbb tgk sampah byk gile kat tempat pelupusan sampah.ehehe.ikut korg la wahai housemate2.aku ikutkan je. 

ok.bangun pg je dpt mesej dpd aifaa.sbnrnye msj tu smpi mlm td kot?ke pg2 buta td.i pun tak perasan.tp perasan bile dh btol2 bgn tido la kan.ehehe.soh gi isi borng posting kat website emoe.what the?kan ke i dh 40 kali (hanya untuk tujuan dramatik.nilai sebenar: 2 kali jek) isi borg posting online tu?die yg blom isi sbnrnye.tsk.takpela beb.dah2 gi isi.aku dh isi berkurun lamenye dh pun.

3,4 hari ni spent byk sgt mase bergayut dgn khairul on the fon.bleh jejak 3 hours before tido tu.ehehehe.ape ntah yg dicakapkan?smpi every nite pun dh tido pkul 2pg.khairul smpi kate, mcm baru2 bercinta je.nk ckp lame2.nk msg selalu.pdhl dh nk jejak 4 tahun dh kot.haih.cepatnye mase berlalu.

nmpknye mcm die seronok dgn rutin baru die.spent mase kat lab smpi pkul 6 kot baru nk balik.tekun btul buat design untuk kaki palsu die tu.technically bukan kaki palsu la,sbb die mcm some sort of walking aid untuk org2 yg lumpuh kaki sbb kene angin ahmar,tapi i nk jugak ckp kaki palsu.ehehe.tu pun die kate nk sambung PhD dlm pendidikan.gile rugi woh2.pastu i dgn lembut dn berhemahnye pun ingatkan die tentang saat2 die buat final year project mase degree yg die risau sgt2 kene extend sbb tak siap2.pasal lattice boltzmann kot.finite element ape ntah.i suke je panggil finite incantatem (spell dlm harry potter yeah~).ehehe.pastu dgn sakit2 kepala buat design n control untuk projek kaki palsu die ni.tak ke syg nk korbankan sume mechanical punye ilmu tu bile nk berhijrah buat PhD dlm education?die kate tak larat nk fikir susah2.uhu.i rase die ni still lagi ade rase nk jadi engineer.tp sbb harapan mak ayah sume tu,die kenela korbankan cite2 die tu.uhu.takpelah sayang.rezeki tu ade kat mane2.

got lots of assignments untuk hanye 3 je subjek yg amek sem ni.

research method:kene buat satu dummy articel yg ade sume elemen APA dlm checklist.pastu kene buat PRO2 untuk thesis punye working title.pastu kene cari 2 articles or papers yg mostly connected dgn our working title.dah 3 keje kat situ.sume deadline minggu dpn plak tuh.ceh.

statistic:kene buat tutorial 1 and 2.pastu kene study pasal measure of dispersion,sbb nk tanye dlm next class,which means this thursday.huh.

learning theories:kene cari 1 study punye article.mesti study.kajian.tak bleh korelasi ke whatever.pastu kene buat review article tu.apakah?pastu kene cari all about anxiety in learning.satu tajuk yg sgt luas,mind u.pastu kene present lagi.kene submit lagi paper dlm format academic writing pasal anxiety ni.

tu blum lg keje2 untuk research.mane nk bace article.mane nk develop courseware.

haih.susah rupenye buat master.sape kate buat master bleh leisure2?

oh.sume org pun buat master leisure2.i je kelam kabut nk setel cepat sbb takut kene panggil posting!haih.

sepatutnye skrg kene kemas rumah dn cuci pinggan dn buang sampah.haih.malasnye nk trun buang sampah.esok jela.eheh.

till then.

ps:hepi besday to dearest aifaa~

cumel kan baby ni.sgt suke bile die senyum camtu.oh.she's a malaysian.being born here n all.tp parents die org timur tengah (cehceh sbb tatau negara ape trus je kate timur tengah).n her name is hajar.just turn 1 last week.sgt suke berjalan2 dekat klia walaupun telah jatuh dengan banyak kalinye.

high school memories.

If you enjoyed your high school years, you'll do it.
If you have nothing else to do, you'll do it.
If you're here to read the questions/answers and pretend to hate to do it, deep down you'll still do it.

>Biography<

1) Which school did you go to?
samura

2) What classes were you
4 bijak--dok dgn sya.
5 cerdik--dok dgn xipoh,athirah,cheezow,zoey n far.

3) What was/were your favourite lesson(s)?
kimia kot.

4) If you could remember, what time was your recess?
adoi.manela nk ingat.kol 10 kot.ke 10.10?ke 9.30?

5) List down your favourite food/snacks.
fillet ayam kat kantin.harge die seringgit.lunch untuk hari2 yg lauk ikan kat dining.

>Student Life<

1) Did you have a nickname way back in high school?
everybody pun call me with my real name,anis or yuhaniz.cume dtg tem2 gedik budak2 ni,adela  panggil antz (ade ke patut diorg kate muke aku mcm muke queen  semut dlm cite antz tu??) ataupun plywood (kerana sungguh kurus dan ciri2 keperempuan belum begitu ketara).

2) How did you wear your socks?
yang bese je.paras buku lali la paling panjang pun.

3) Have you been suspended due to the way you put on your uniform?
secara formalnya tak penah la.but since i was one of the naqibah (ye  i benarkan u all gelak skrg.ok dah stop) yg pakai tudung paling pendek,so ade la dgr suara2 sumbang org tak ouas hati dgn my appearance.sukati aku la kan.mak aku yg belikan tudung.bukan  kaco result spm korg pun kan.

4) Were you given plenty of reminders about your appearance?
senior2 kot.dgrla jugak.dpd tak berstokin gi prep mlm,dh berstokin pule.kain dalam n camisole memg wajib pakai la kan.tp handsocks memg tidak le.blum smpi lagi serunye.ehehe.

5) Who did you look up to when you were in high school?
myself.ahahaha.bukan2.mestila first ranker skolah.encik anas aka balun.walaupun die tidak sehensem bard pitt dn slalu memakai baju melayu orennye itu,tp otaknye sungguh genius ok.skrg dh otw jd dr kot.

>Punishments<

1) Name one memorable scene where you were punished in front of the whole class.
oh tak pnah kene punish lagi.heheh.clean record weh.

2) How many times did you skip class? What were you doing?
skali je skip skolah sbb demam.tu pun gi sickbay.baik nye.anak sape ni.

3) Give one scene where you escaped from being= caught/punished?
tak ingat la.slalu je buat jahat.skip riadah contohnye.tp tak pnh la terkantoi.

4) Did you vandalize any school property?
meja je la kot.conteng sane conteng sni.tp jarang sbb meja sume dh kene wrap dgn wrapping paper cantik2.konon2 keceriaan kelas la.ahaha.kan dah syg nk conteng.bijak sungguh la skolah ni cipta pertandingan keceriaan kelas.ha.lagi satu.tulis name kat kerusi kat kelas sbb kerusi salu gile kene curik!tu kire vandalisme tak?

5) Did you ever make any teacher cry?
ntah la.tak pnh kot.tak pnh la pulak dorg nk menangis dpn kitorg  ni.

>School Staff<

1) Who was your favourite teacher?
cikgu Hassan.my class teacher mase form 4 n form 5.selalu berbakti mengeluarkan duit kat atm stiap kali ayah masukkan sbb tak bleh outing.ehehehe.

2) Describe your headmasters
tak bape kenal la HM.tak berapa rapat dg n student.yg paling populat mestila GPK Hem.cikgu zakaria aka zack.ehehe.paling popular ok.paling.

3) Who was the funniest/weirdest/loudest teacher?
ustaz kimia kot.tgk.dah salu panggil ustaz kimia sampai dh tatau name btul die.memg best.bile die marah,puji je kate die hensem.mesti die trus cool down right away.

>Social Circle<

1) Were you popular back then?
tak kot.tak pandai.tak cantik.tak berape gedik(bahahahaha).body pun tak hot.so tak femes.

2) Were you in a big group of boys/girls or small ones?
bese2 je.tak berape ade grup pun.jz people yg selalu hang  out je.tu pun various.kdg2 dak dorm.kdg2 classmate.

3) Who were your best buddies?
dorm mates yg sangat2 cool!dn classmates la of kos.especially team2 memekak kat blkg.

4) Did you and your friends have nicknames?
takde kot.like i said,kami tidak popular.bukan lah smpi tersorok.hina sangat tu.cume bukan la termasuk dlm crowd yg popular.

5) What were your favourite memories of you and your friends?
oh sangat byk.paling memorable?mestila aktiviti meng-usha khairul.dijalankan dgn giat tanpa mengira masa ye.ahahaha.malu2.oh jgn risau.he knew.even back then.bermulalah kisah cinta tanpa suara kami.cehcehceh.lagi nk dramatik.

>Co-curricular Activities<

1) What type of CCA were you in?
renjer puteri.persatuan kesenian dan kebudayaan.and quatermaster.the ones yg jaga gym n sports equipments.

2) What did you have to bring to your CCA?
takde ape kot.

3) What did your CCA required you to do?
camping.menari(oh i paling suke ini).

4) Got injured?
tak.

>Closing Ceremony<

1) How did high school change you?
oh in many2 ways.many many many ways.


2) Sing one verse of your school song.

janji kami pada negara dan bangsa menunaikan khidmat dan jasa
berilmu berbakti amalan mulia

heh tu je yg i ingat.

3) What was your favourite question?
kenape ek?ehehe.

4) Who/what will you remember from your high school?
every single memory.tp tak bleh la nk ingat sume org dlm my batch.ramai ooo.

5) Any memories you will not forget?
ade2.kejadian hitam (cehceh ayat taknak dramatik pulak kan) yg menyebabkan paper bahasa melayu 1 trial setara sbp ditangguh 1 hari dan membuatkan soalan2 tersebut bocor hasil maklumat sekolah2 sbp yg lain.heh.

after a long while.

ahahaha.lame sgt tak dihapdate blog ni.bukan takde mase.bukan takde peristiwa.bukan takde peluang.bukan takde internet connection.tp ntah.maybe sbb mood yg takde kot.uhuhuhu.

skrg i dh balik ke serdang.new life begins.life yg not so new la,since im still a student n have like 3 3-hour-classes per weeks n stuff,tp new jugak la sbb im now officially a post graduate student.ehehehe.suke jugakla.sume org kate larat lagi ke nk blaja,kan dh berbelas tahun dok hadap buku je,but i suke.bukan maksudnye i suke study.i suke jadi student je.ehehehe.lgpun that's the only thing that i know how to do n how to do it well.i mesti keje punye,sooner or later sbb ade kontrak dgn KPM and all (i takkan lari ok,kesian KPM bg puluh2 ribu kat i pastu i nk lari pulak),tp sementara tunggu posting yg ntah bile ni.baikla sambung blaja kan.tak de la rugi mase.n since khairul pun further,so i rase mane aci,i x bleh kalah dgn die,i kene further jugak.tak kire la die further dlm mech eng n i further dlm edu,yg penting nk lawan die jugak.hee.

SDASA.rindu?ntahla.tak kot (hahahaha cikgu Md Dlan jgn marah ye).penat la life org bekerja ni.even jd cimgu.ingat sng ke jd cikgu?ingt sng ke nk control budak2 yg mcm2 perangai?nantila.im not fully prepared lagi nk berdepan dgn budak2 yg mcm2 ragam.tp bile i packing ritu,i jumpe la hadiah yg my student, 4A8 bagi as parting gifts.

ahahaha.rase touched plak.time kaseh la u guys.susah susah aje.ehehehe.

balik serdang dlm ari rabu lepas.after cuti kat umah yg memg super best aa sbb dpt 4 pasang baju kurung baru. (ehehehe time kaseh mak i love u muah muah). pastu dgn everyday dating kat utm sbb everyday pun g utm (ok technically tak dating la,jz kuar je sbb bertiga dgn my cousin skali, ain) tp memg best la. bile balik serdang,pg shopping dgn housemate2 tercinta.along nk beli wardrobe kayu sbb sakit hati wardrobe die roboh (wardrobe kain yg bleh zip2 tu.i pun pelik cane bleh roboh sbb mine elok je lagi keadaannye.musykil) n tilam sbb die ade katil tp lom ade tilam.i pun nk cari tilam,katil dgn meja study sbb nk bg lg comfortable untuk study dn buat assignment n stuff (ceh ceh study konon nk bangge diri la tu). so pg beli sume.so this is how my room looks like skrg.

my room ni comel je.bile dh letak sume brg2 ni,ade la space skit untuk solat.tuala yg tergantung kat kusi tu i baru kuarkan ok,fresh tu.yg lagi satu dh cuci dh jemur dh pun.oh did i mention yg my housemates dh beli fridge n washing machine?tgk,kaya tak diorg dpt allowance sbulan 1500+900 ringgit malaysia ok.

speaking about allowance.khairul kan further study n his lecturer dpt geran MOSTI so he sorts of menumpang sekali la geran lect die tu sbb die tlg buat projek tu jugak.so his yuran sume covered,dpt cubicle sdiri dkt postgraduate room,dpt PC HP baru,n dpt allowance rm2000 sbulan.pastu ayah die bg allowance rm500 sbulan sbb die masih blaja lg.so total sbulan die dpt rm2500.same dgn gaji engineer.ahahaha.dahla tak kene bayar pape.jeles jeles.lagi cepat la die simpan duit.lg cepat la i jd Mrs Khairul Fadzli (insya Allah).haih.takut2.

so doakan i berjaya.in everythin i do.amin.

ps:one of my fren kate,"ko ni nape ade krisis identiti ke kejap i kejap saya kejap aku kat blog?". nk tau jawapan saye? "sukahati aku la blog aku bukan blog ko kalo ko tak ske kp jgn bace aku tak soh pun" dgn satu nafas ok.plus reaksi muke yg sungguh poyo tanpe perasaan bersalah.sila bayangkan.ahahaha.

sumpah kucing ni comel gile mintak makanan kat i mase i tgh mkn ngn khairul.

off.

salam.

sepatutnye skrg sy kene study sbb esok ade final exam.uhuhu.biasala.kami golongan2 kurg bernasib baik ni memg sentiasa kene ade kelas2 intensif.by kami, i mean aifaa and me.its ok.we love programming. *rolling eyes*

sok pun kene pg MOHE anta application untuk budget mini punye scholar tu.harap2 takde mslh n dpt lah.uhuhuhu.sape la nk byrkan yuran tiap2 sem yg seribu lebih tu kan.

exam sok ptg.pkul 2.pas tu kene terus bergegas balik ke PD,sbb mlm tu ade kelas tusyen dgn budak2 tingkatan 2 asrama.subjek:sains.sok kelas last,tak bleh nk miss peluang jumpe dgn diorg.sbb compare dgn any form 2-ers yg ade kat skolah ni,diorg ni better la.ade yg ade cite2 nk masuk MTD n ATMA sbb nk sgt jd engineer dlm military.ikutlah.yg pntg usaha kene same tinggi level dgn cita2.

speaking of school,esok kitorg cuti.sbb final exam whatever ni kan.hari selasa kelas last dgn 4A8,sbb hari jumaat yg spatutnye jd kelaslast dh jadi hari untuk perjumpaan 3 penjuru.hari ni habis >rm50 jugak la beli souviner kat budak2 tu.uhuhuhu.sape kate yuhaniz tak syg student die?

hati rase resah je.mcm ade bnde tak sempurna.skrg ni mcm cepat je touching.uhuu.bile tak dpt pape je,trus rase mcm nk merajuk bawa diri.kdg2 tu pd org yg tak btul plak tu.takut plak lah nt org ingat sy ni mcm some kind of attention-hunger person yg always crave for people's attention smpi nk merajuk2 bagai.hai.susah btul.mintakla dijauhkan perasaan ni.

hai.

doakan sy berjaya dgn cemerlang untuk exam esok.amin.